Nonverbal Communication in Close Relationships: What words don’t tell us

Preface
Contents
List of Contributors
List of Figures
List of Photos
1: Interpersonal Oculesics: Eye-Related Signals of Attraction, Interest, and Connection
	Introduction
		Oculesic Structures
		Multiple Meanings of Eye-Related Behaviors Before getting into some of the specific functions of these oculesic structures, it must be noted that the range of structural behaviors for the eyes is relatively limited compared to, say, the nonver
	Attraction
		Initial Attraction
		Oculesic Indicators of Attraction
	Pupil Dilation As discussed earlier in this chapter, people may interpret dilated pupils of another individual as an indication of attraction (Hess, 1965). While this is a valid assumption grounded in research, there also exist other reasons for
		Initiation of Interaction
		Flirting
	Connection
		Intimacy
	Antisocial Contexts
		Misperception
		Dominance
		The Case of the “Male Gaze”
		Consequences
	Conclusion
	References
2: Communication and Communal Emotions in the Learning of Love
	Defining Love
	Love and Communication
	The Biology of Love
	The Evolution of Love
	The Development of Love
	The Social Psychology of Love
	References
3: The Role of Nonverbal Communication in Leadership Skills
	Introduction
	Nonverbal Behavior and Leadership
	Nonverbal Expression and Perception of Dominance and Submissiveness in a Small Group
	Study of the Nonverbal Behavior of Leaders and Other Members in the Small Group Context
		Protocol for Registering Nonverbal Signs of Domination and Power
		Design of the Study
		What Was Confirmed and What Was Not?
		The Role of the Nonverbal Behavior of the Leader in Motivating Subordinates
	Concluding Remarks
	References
4: The Look of Love: Evolution and Nonverbal Signs and Signals of Attraction
	Primitives of Attraction
	Nonverbal Static Features of the Face
		Symmetry
		Averageness
		Facial Adiposity
		Skin Color and Smoothness
		Sexual Dimorphism
		Summary of Static Facial Features
	Nonverbal Static Features of the Body
		Summary of Static Body Features
		The Mere Exposure Factor
	Nonverbal Dynamics of Attraction
		The Face
		The Body
		Summary of Nonverbal Dynamics of the Face and Body
	Nonverbal Dynamics of a Genuine Relationship
		Attention
		Trust
		Commitment
	Conclusion
	References
5: Love Signals and the Reproductive Force
	Introduction
	Some Psychology Behind the Reproductive Force
		Evolution: Selfishly Reinforced
		Intimacy
		Passion
	Human Nonverbal Actions and Reproductive Forces
		Courtship
			Nonverbal Negotiation
			From Reptiles to Humans
		Facial Expressions
			Play Face
			Makeup
		Gaze
			Gaze and Romance
			Gaze and Sexual Interest
		Laughter and Mating
		Vocal Intonation and Mating
		Kissing
			The Sensation of Kissing
			Kissing and the Assessment of a Potential Mate
			Kissing and Signs of Love
			Kissing and Head Movement
			Kissing and Gender
			Kissing in the Animal World
		Shoulder Shrug
		Touch and Love Signals
			The Importance of Touch as a Signal of Love
			Biology of Touch and Love
			Gender and Touch Signals of Love
			Touch Signals of Love: Stage and Type of Relationship
			Types of Touch and Love Signals
		Dance
	Self-Presentation, Nonverbal Love Signals, and the Reproductive Force
		Attractiveness
			Evolution and the Halo Effect
			Personality and Self-Care
			Cultures and Judgments of Attractiveness
			Factors Related to ‘Body Attractiveness’
		Facial Beauty
			Nonverbal Perception
				Usage
			Eyes and Cheekbones
			Jaws
			Love at First Sight
			Koinophilia
			Facial Neoteny and Sexual Maturity
			Symmetry
		Prom Dresses
			“I am here”
			Wedding Dresses
			Messaging Features
			Red, White, and Plaid
		Clothing
			Cloth Signs
			Wearable Cues
			Bracelets
			Anatomy
			Flounce & Weave
		Hairdos
			Gender Signs
			Biology
			Media
		Art: Faces and Bodies
			Aesthetic Signage
			Artistic Emotion
			Sfumato
		Shoes
			Uniqueness v. Uniformity
			Archaeology
		Motor Vehicles
			Multiply Adapted
			Vehicular Grille
			Evolution
			Vroom-Vroom
			Emotional Valence
			Vrooming Semantics
	Conclusion
	References
6: The Verbal and Nonverbal Communication of Romantic Interest
	The Communication of Romantic Interest
	Why Is This Distinction Between Flirtation and Romantic Interest Needed?
	The Expression of Sexual Interest Versus Romantic Interest: Who Does It First and Where in Heterosexual Relationships?
	The Expression of Sexual and Romantic Interest: What Cues Are Used?
	How Do We Navigate Through Uncharted Areas of Romantic Relationship Development?
	There Are Heteronormative Smudges on Our Lens
	A Different Lens for Romantic Relationship Development
	Conclusion
	References
7: Misunderstood Non-verbal Cues in Close Relationships: Contributions of Research over Opinions
	Distinguishing Lay from Scientific
	Some Non-verbal Misunderstandings
		The Advice to Make Eye Contact on a First Date
		The Policy to Communicate “Yes” if You Are Interested in Sex
		Distinguishing Observers from Relational Partners’ Reports on Haptic Behaviour
		Non-verbal Cultural Blinders
	Conclusion
	References
8: What Words Don’t Tell Us: Non-verbal Communication and Turmoil in Romantic Relationships
	Non-verbal Communication and Romantic Relationships in Turmoil
		Touch and Affection in Romantic Relationships
		Proxemics in Romantic Relationships
		Eye Gaze in Romantic Relationships
		Vocalics in Romantic Relationships
	Relational Turbulence and Non-verbal Cues
		Dyadic Synchrony
	Conclusion
	References
9: Negative Emotions, Facial Clues, and Close Relationships: Facing the End?
	Love
	Need to Belong
	Toward Emotions
	Verbal Versus Non-verbal
	Closer to Face and Its Signals
	Emotional Bonds
	What Makes Stable Relationships Different from Unstable Ones?
	Contempt
	Contempt Smile
	The Recognition of the Facial Expression of Contempt
	How Does Facial Contempt Affect the Individual Against Whom It Is Directed?
	Positive Side of Negative Emotions
	References
10: Love in the Time of COVID-19: What We Can Learn About Non-verbal Behaviour from Living with a Pandemic
	The Importance of Non-verbal Cues in Sending Relational Messages
	Equifinality
	The Rule-Governed Nature of Communicating Non-verbally
	The Particular Relevance of Haptics
	The Changeable Nature of the Communication Code
	The Imperative of Empathy and Compassion
	Conclusion
	References
11: Non-verbal Communication: From Good Endings to Better Beginnings
	Sternberg’s Approach to Relationships
	Interpersonal Perspective on Relationships: The Four-Phase Model
	Nowicki–Duke Four-Phase Relationship Model (4-PRM)
	The Circumplex Theory
	Non-verbal Communication
	Challenges in Non-verbal Communication
	The 4-PRM Process
		Choice
	Love Is a Garden: An Application of the 4-PRM
		Beginning
		Deepening
	Non-verbal Behavior Associated with Closeness
		Ending
	Implications of Adult Life Development for Relationships
	References
12: The Functions and Consequences of Interpersonal Touch in Close Relationships
	Primary Functions of Touch in Social Interaction
		Touch Can Serve As a Form of Paralanguage
		Touch Can Encourage Prosocial Behavior and Gain Compliance
		Touch Can Reflect the Intimacy of a Relationship
		Touch Can Express Affection and Emotional Support
		Biological and Social Influences on Interpersonal Touch
		The Benefits of Touch and the Consequences of Touch Deprivation
		The Development and Influence of Rules, Norms, and Stereotypes
			The Influence of Culture
			The Influence of Gender and Personality
	Future Implications: Effects of Social Media and the Pandemic
		The Effects of COVID-Related Touch Deprivation
			Effects on Children
			Effects on Intimate Adult Relationships
			Effects on Healthcare Workers
			Effects on Adolescents: The Dual Impact of Touch Deprivation and Social Media
		Positive Programmes and Alternatives to Address Touch Deprivation
			For Children
			For Adults
		Technological Innovations
	References
13: Nonverbal Skills in Relationships: Too Little or Too Much May Be a Bad Thing
	Nonverbal/Emotional Skills: A Model
	Measuring Nonverbal/Emotional Skills
	The Role of Emotional/Nonverbal Skills in the Formation and Maintenance of Interpersonal Relationships
		Initial Encounters and Relationship Formation
		Emotional Skills in Friendships and Romantic Relationships
		Emotional Skills and Relationships at Work
		Nonverbal Skill Deficits and Relationships
		Nonverbal Skill Deficits in the Workplace
		Emotional Skill Surplus and Relationships (Too Much of a Good Thing)
		Emotional Skill Balance and Relationships
		Conclusions and Future Research and Practice
	References
14: Non-verbal Communication in Relationships as a Link between Affect and Social Intelligence
	Duplex Theory of Love
		Theory of Love As a Story
		Triangular Theory of Love
		Application of the Duplex Theory to Non-verbal Communication
	Relation to Other Chapters in the Book
	References
Index